finding my groove, my fun, my life

my new life

so, this journey is supposed to be opening me up to new experiences, the alive me turning off the dead me. part of that is breaking out of habits, giving everything another chance and just really going with the journey and not stunting myself. when i first went to san diego i was only going to stay for a couple of hours. when i saw ricky and we hung out, a couple of days. i talked to steve and he gave me the advice that i should live my life and not hold myself back.

and so i took it.

it turned out to be a great thing. originally i didnt want to stay for this block party, because i felt four days would be too much imposition. but i did stay and it was great. we went to the party, the block party, around 3pm. there wasnt so much going on then, but we bought some cups and wristbands for $10. that ensured you access to the kegs all night long, you just had to stand in the ever growing line. i did that about 3 times, and then had to urinate. the lines to the port-a-potty's were twice as long, so i just walked the two blocks back to the house.

ricky's neighbor and his friend were walking back at the same time, for similar reasons...plus one. to smoke pot! duh, this is ocean beach and this is apparently what happens here. i was invited back to his house to smoke with them, and for whatever reason i followed. if i was going to say no to the pipe, i should have just not gone in.

the last time, before tonight, i smoked pot was november 2003 in miami florida. some people will remember that as the night i came out of a self imposed exile from my family and friends. that night i called my father and made contact for the first time in about nine months, apparently it was a big deal. this time, not so much.

but it was okay. i only took two hits and it was still early enough that i was able to function and get over it. at this point i switched from beer to vodka, and we walked back to the party. there we enjoyed some loud and out of place metal music, a liquor luge, and a swelling crowd.

the liquor luge

let me pause for a moment on the liquor luge, because it is something i have never seen before. it is a block of ice on a wooden stand that is tilted downward. paths are carved out of the top of the ice, from the top to the bottom about an inch deep. party goers go to the liquor luge and one friend pours x amount of liquor from the top and the other friend waits at the bottom with an open mouth. it was a more hilarious thing to watch people try to drink from it, as the night wore on the luge carved deeper and deeper. i never used the luge, but seriously considered it.

more partiness ensued from there, and it all kind of beomes regular party with hazy memory. there were some bands, metal for some reason, and then the last band was reggae. i had my drink on by that time, and my smoke had been on, and i just grooved with the music. i was actually dancing a bit and being in the crowd and not being so self conscious. it was really a good feeling. i dont even like reggae that much but it worked with the moment and i rolled with it. becasue thats what today is all about!

goodbye ob!

then it was 10 and the block party was over. we had to disperse. we went back to the house and ate some food, drank some more beers and then walked off to find the next party. eventually we ended up at a fishbone show on the main street. it was $12 to get in and they had already started so we stood by the back door for awhile and listened. i almost snuck in that way, but i was caught by a bouncer.

then the few of us that remained walked down to the beach around 12:30 and just watched the water roll in, enjoying the night air and the beach and everything. we were there for about an hour and then it was time to call it! we went back to the house and i got out the computer to start typing this but i passed out in the middle of it. then i picked up writing it again today, and my memory of that night is complete. cape mayhem, ob, i will not forget you!